Bleed Flowers

by Raena Cain
(Velaris, Night Court)

When I am gone
I want to die in a field of wildflowers
I want their stems tangled in my brown locks
Their vibrant petals falling onto my closed eyelids
As a final, shuddering breath
Wreaks through my body
And leaves it colder than the frost
That covers the field in early winter
I want the last thing I see
To be the golden sun
Shining through dense forest leaves
To bless my skin with a soft glow
To allow me to feel beautiful
One last time
I can only hope that the flowers
Will fill my veins
Stain them lilac
As bright as the flowers themselves
The soft flow of petals
As the rivers run below my skin
Keeping life in my eyes
If I were to open my skin
Let my lifeforce bleed out
I would bleed flowers
At least, when I feel beautiful
Other days
Storm clouds inhabit that space
Stealing where beauty once reigned
Leaving me bare and desolate
The rain that they let fall
Leaks from my eyes
Showering my pain
Letting it grow bigger and looming
The rain forgets the flowers
Forgets the happiness I once had
I plead for my flowers
And thankfully
They return to me
Dawn shines in my eyes
The shadows fade away
Once the blossoms return
When I go
I think I will be an Iris
A lone soul
But able to push through and stay strong
I will not bend
I will not break
I will not let the rain wash me away
I will stay strong
And let myself bleed bouquets
Of all the colors in the rainbow
Their sweet smells whisking the sadness away
And I shall die that way
Surrounded by wildflowers
The sun radiant against my shut eyes
A cool breeze drifting by
Petals strewn about me
A rose around my wrist