Cuthbert Custard

by Ben Szwediuk
(Reading, Berkshire, England)

Cuthbert Custard, purveyor of mustard,
quite contrary to his name,
was a savoury bread snack connoisseur
and condiments were his game.

Johnny Savage- the earl of sandwich-
and glutton like his dad.
Preferred his bread as plain as day
and mustard made him mad.

Every day John took his pay
and to Tesco's he would go.
His ham sandwich filled with mustard grains
And John's top would surely blow.

In pique Earl John dropped a bomb,
on Cuthbert's mustard truck.
Then Tesco's did use Mayonnaise
-John really had no luck!