Escape from the Zoo

by Alan Balter
(Northbrook, Illinois)

Escape From the Zoo


Animals at the zoo complained anew about their dirty cages
And a barbarian veterinarian whose behavior was outrageous
In the long run, not a thing got done, so on a rainy night
They bid adieu to the zoo much to their delight

Now there’s an owl on the prowl and a moose on the loose
With a gander who meandered, ‘cause he was sick of the abuse
Three ferrets and some parrots rode on a zebra’s back
And a goat with no raincoat had an anxiety attack

A hippopotamus, like a lot of us, squeezed on a crowded bus
And made idle chatter that didn’t matter with a goose named Gus
A leopard chose a suit of clothes with purple polka dots
He took it back in a flash, because it clashed with spots

Some lions kept on tryin’ to ride a roller coaster
But they fell for the smell of bagels in a toaster
A camel tried to rent a place beside the police station
Until an officer offered her an out of town location

A gorilla bought vanilla yogurt at a Dairy Queen
And shared it with a polar bear on the village green
Two jack rabbits with bad habits hailed a taxi for a ride
A sly red fox eating salty lox chose to be their guide

Three mustangs with black bangs hanging past their noses
Made a stop at a flower shop for a dozen roses
You could tell from the smell where the skunks all went
A public shower every hour to freshen up their scent

Soon all the critters who weren’t quitters started feeling ill
Because malaria in the area had moved up from Brazil
Piles of pills calmed their chills and broke their fevers too
Then they regrouped on chicken soup and were good as new