Mending These Fences

by Vance R Farrell
(Allentown Pa)

She says, I should not feel that way
Crooked stillness in my being
Slapped and whipped by the past
Give the difference between knowing and seeing

She says that nothing's changed when everything is gone
Still the emptiness in my stomach after a filling meal
I brace myself with each ring of the phone
Trying so hard to change the way I feel

She smiles and pauses, I am left to drift away
Spinning out days without a reason to save
My head bobs and ducks with each passing cloud
A hidden tear, a blown kiss and a simple wave

Words like deep breaths haunt me from within
Unable to catch up with their meaning
Left the garage door open again
Gone is the lamppost with its leaning

Who of them at all would follow me?
Shrinking personality
Sputtering with a broken wing
Able to mouth the words but never sing

Each time I try to own up
I hear you scrutinize my defenses
Pulverize,
Minimize,
Criticizes
Crucify,
There is never mending to these fences.