Quiet Healing

by JAVOK
(Canada)

Battered and emasculated
Embarrassed and humiliated
Lacking the courage and testosterone
To laugh in the face of adversaries
Shameful of my abject vulnerability
When will I ever learn?
Soft hearts are prey for hardened souls
And now I seek shadows to hide behind
To lick the wounds of an ignominious fool
Consumed by the beast of apathy
Once again
I am lightly chewed and swallowed whole

A need to be needed
A want to be wanted
And a desire give unconditionally
To lovers and to some inscrutable God
Has exposed a gullible heart
Naive and childlike
Underdeveloped and susceptible
Leaving a guileless spirit exposed as well
Somewhat defenseless
Hiding behind shadows
Licking the wounds of besieged human emotion
Unable to maintain a steady stream of thought
Or feeling
Laying still, now
Rebuilding courage and testosterone
So very still
And alone
In quiet, quiet healing