Scared

by Emily
(Missouri)

you told me i wasn't ready
i countered
you asked why
i didn't answer

you showed up at my house
i told you to go
you wouldn't leave
i freaked

my words ignored
you finally left
you tried to call me
i wouldn't answer

i was scared
you didn't care
you were being selfish
only thinking of your feelings

i wanted to die
i was ready
now i'm too scared
not for the reasons you may be thinking

but for fear of you showing up unwelcome,
again
i am still ready to go
but now i can't act on that

you ruined me
some may say you saved me
you didn't
you scared me